How Different Things Are

I have been super busy with work and life so I have not been writing in this as much as I would like. For once in my life i am actually busy and not just with work. Now that I have a boyfriend who lives 10minutes from my work we actually go and do stuff. Work hasn't changed like my job but not enough money nor am i treated fairly there. I am in the process of looking for a new job.  I have applied a couple places but have heard nothing back unfortunately. One of them being a baker at Panera for crying out loud. I am desperate as you can see. I need money to pay my loans back and this job aint cutting it.And cant go back to school anytime soon because of my loans soo thats awesome not:/ Hopefully things will start to look up in that area. The boyfriend and I are fantabulous could not be happier:) We went to boston for the weekend for valentines day and it was super fun! Had a blast just the two of us:) I have been at his house like 4 days out of the week. Which i mean saves my parents money so they shouldnt complain haha. I may eventually move in with him down the road anyways. He also has been house shopping too and including me as well in the picture with our two puppies haha. 
Anywho parents havent met him yet but will by the end of the week my brother and sister in law are coming home for the week to get stuff before moving to colorado! so big family dinner haha. I met his dad but that is it so far. we are going camping in July which i am excited about! yay camping:) In a cabin whoot
I guess that is really it so far my last friend at work found another job so i am the only one left which makes me want to find a job even more. Still working on my veterinary assistant certification as well.
So lets see what happens in the next couple months shall we.

Moving On Up

Well since it has been so long that i have written in this i wont go into detail about every little thing that has happened since this blog isn't read that much anyway. Start off with I went to Hawaii in beginning of December  to visit my brother and sister-in-law. It was a blast to say the least. A well deserved family vacation! It was worth all the plane traveling and money. I thank my work for also giving me more vacation than i actually had but it was the only way i could go. I will never forget it:)

Next after i got back from vacation work became a hell hole because a co worker left and no one was hired for the holiday time so we were working our asses off i was so tired. I got overtime for like 4 weeks. Yes the paycheck was nice but damn i am lucky i did not get sick from exhaustion and the weather was not to fun either. SNOW SNOW FREEZING FREEZING ICE ICE. and i mean freezing like 30 below. but we made it through and we should be getting someone soon she just has to put her two weeks notice in at her former work. I have also decided not re apply to vet school this year. First i dont have a vet recommendation because I have yet to be able to work under one. I dont have the money to spend to get rejected again and should retake my gre's for a better score, I would like to go back to school to be a technician which should be only a couple years. Yes it more money added to my loans but right now its my only option to defer my loans for a couple years and get a better job. I have to finish my veterinary assistant certification as well. I have yet to tell my parents because i dont know how to make it sound good. I also need better experience and more diverse experience. I want to feel more prepared.

Other news I have a..BOYFRIEND. like holy crap did not see this coming. at all. Anywho he is a close friend of my friend i met at work just like the last guy but the best part is he isnt like the last one. When i first met him i was like no way would i ever date him or ever be interested in dating him. he also had a girlfriend at the time so i mean there is that. We hung out sporadically whenever i was with my friend and he happened to show up or be there. He started talking to me on facebook now and than and its like well im glad i have another guy friend and he is hilarious so thats nice. Then i gave him my number to text me because im not on facebook enough to chat. so we started talking more and more and more like everyday pretty much all day. we hung out more and more than he finally admitted he was lustering after me all the while still in a relationship and than slowly i started to like him we talked about everything and anything under the sun we hit on each other like mad. and eventually he made the decision to end it with his gf (all the while he felt something was missing in that relationship) and we started dating and i like him so much its been awhile since i really felt this way. and he asked me to be his gf. i am so happy and he is so great to me. i couldn't be happier right now well i mean i could if financially things got better but he lives 10min from my work. so its nice and convenient. and ahh hes so great and nice and funny and we like very similar things and we feel the same way about a lot of things. he likes to spoil me too and treats me well. I look forward to more days to come:) im actually looking forward to valentines day this year!

Moving Forward

Since it's been a few days clearly some things have gone on. First in August, Anthony and I (after we had some time apart) went to Acadia National Park and Bar Harbor for the day. First we stopped at a really delicious breakfast place on the way and he paid. Then we made it to Bar Harbor and it was a beautiful day even though finding parking was hard. We talked about everything and we are both still very flirty with each other. It's just how we naturally are towards each other and will be with our weird friendship.We watched the sunset on Cadillac mountain. We got back at like 12am but it was such a good day. Then we went to see a movie like a couple weeks later and that was fun. But since i paid for all the food he now owes me dinner. Since then he has become very busy being a full time student and full time working but even though we tell each other how busy we are yet we see each other at least once a week now and just hang out. Usually after we get out of work. We had a long serious convo a couple week a go and yelling occurred but everything was put out in the open that i had been holding back and it felt good. Then we cuddled afterwards haha. We talk on the phone here and there and text. Last night we had our version of pizza and beer. Meat lovers pizza, hot wings, angry orchard for me, and hard liqueur for him. I didn't get home until 1am. He let me borrow some sweatpants because i was sick of wearing scrubs for so long. It was a blast though im glad we hung out. Uhm i am working on getting my veterinary assistant career diploma at pennfoster. it feels good to be learning again. It's interesting stuff! Work sucks and takes up ALL my time to the point of where i barely see my parents even and i live with them. Im working on my resume so i can send it into a kennel that's like 15 mins away from me that's also connected to a veterinary hospital. I got a new tattoo in August. Cherry blossom on my shoulder. I love it! and i love the month of October because well HALLOWEEN! even though im working that entire week. Uhm we got our plane tickets for the trip to Hawaii in December and i cant wait. Im hoping to find a new digital camera on black Friday because i don't want to use my cellphone or the piece of crap camera i already have that i don't use anymore. Other than that not much going on. Oh my ex is going to be dad..good for him.. 
I have started going yoga on a daily basis and since i have been to my doctors I have lost weight like 8 pounds but still its something. Oh and I have been baking more and we got a Keurig the other weekend and I love it! It's bright blue! and now we have dsl which means i can stream all the time and now get netflix instant back!! im working on Dexter now:) Life is okay for now.

Keep Moving

Clearly it has been awhile since i have written in this. I guess i just have been avoiding to type what really is going on. Anthony dumped me even though we weren't even in a relationship. It really hit me hard and it sucked. We are trying things out as friends. It kind of still sucks because clearly i have feelings for him more than a friend but i have to hinder them because he just wants us as friends. We didn't see each other for a month and then we went to Acadia together for the entire day and it was actually really great. I thought it was going to hurt but it didn't. I still have moments where i kind of wish we were more but i have to keep those thoughts to myself. We are going to the movies tomorrow to see The Worlds end. Should be fun although we don't talk a lot in between the time we see each other.. He kind of sucks at talking via phone or Facebook. I have to learn to get used to it. I mean god forbid he doesn't love me and my name doesn't rhyme with Feather therefore why talk to me anyways. I'm lower on his totem pole now so whatever. Nothing is going to come out of this friendship as in it wont move forward because he doesn't feel anything more for me than that which means why the hell did he keep saying how much he liked me and how wonderful and etc i was when we were dating. You son of a B! men i swear to god. Fix yourself before breaking me huh. 
Work is ridiculous and i want to take a veterinary assistant program at pennfoster. it says it should take about 4 months. 
Supposed to be going to Hawaii in December to see my brother and sister in law and i have to save a grand up for this trip. Yeah that should be real easy. I hope i can even get the time off. Other than that not much else going on in my world for now.

Still Breathing

Clearly it has been awhile since I have updated this. I wouldn't say a lot of things have gone on but enough to write about. I have decided to take grad classes online instead of going for my vet tech degree and then reapply to vet school again. I keep changing my mind but I think this time I know what I am going to do. Work is work busy and overworked. Could be worse I suppose.
My other best friend from high school is moving to Florida Saturday. so there goes that. At least I got to say goodbye to her.
Things with Anthony have been so friggan crazy its not even funny. This is what you get when you see each other but aren't in a relationship. I don't even know where to begin. Since my birthday I guess the first thing was his friend whos also mine decided to start crap with him because he wont get the balls to be in a relationship with me and thinks he is just playing with me and stringing me a long and so forth and that pissed him off to the point of where he almost said forget it to me nd walked away. Bull#&$* if I was going to let that happen. I haven't been with someone in over three years and I really like him so I was going to lose him after barely 2 months. Things did go back to normal for a little while after that blew off. Then he had PortConMaine which is like Comic-Con but its in Portland ,maine. and he became very busy and we didn't get to spend as much time together which was fine I completely understood he works there so he has a lot to do. So we went out on a triple date with my other two girlfriends and their boys and it was really nice. Im glad we got to do it before he left and it was enjoyable. Throughout all the time we kept going back to the convo of why we aren't in a relationship. He is just confusing. Everyone is at a different time in their life so hey whatever. We don't need to label us as anything right now im happy your happy its fine. So then he came back from PortCon and spent the next day (he has been on vacation for 10 days) with his ex/best friend who's still in love with him and im pretty sure he still has feelings for her which is definitely another reason why we aren't in a relationship even though he didn't actually come out and say those exact words. We talked the day after and I could tell he was upset about it because shes moving away and obviously she still means a lot to him but I hope he can get out of his sad slump eventually and move on with his life. Shes going off and doing something she loves more than anything or anyone probably and he has to move on with his life as well. Im sure they will stay close friends I have no doubt about that. But it is a part of life people who mean a lot to you move on and away but that doesn't mean you have to not be part of each others lives anymore it is just in a different way.
I on the other hand hope it distresses him from worrying about it all the time and we can move on the next step not meaning a relationship just not stuck I don't know. we'll see what happens. How long can you date someone without really falling for them and not being in a relationship? I haven't seen him since last Tuesday morning and wont be able to until this coming Tuesday if I can. he says his life is crazy because he has college stuff. Well I didn't bother you about seeing you over your vacation. I m just asking for one day. Im sure it wont hinder the other stuff you are doing that much.
Busy work weekend ahead. Working literally all weekend!

Birthday Week

I say week because today is really my birthday but I celebrated it a few days before. Monday Anthony took me to work and then took me out to lunch during my work break and paid for me. Then picked me up from work and we hung out for awhile at his place. We were supposed to go out to eat so we got all dressed up but by the time we left everywhere was closing. SOOOO we went to Shaws all dressed up and he bought food to cook me an Italian dinner and some wine. So he made me Caprese  Salad and Shrimp Carbonara. It was amazing and delicious:) I liked watching him cook. The next day I worked all day so we hung out after work. Watched game of thrones and such. Then Wednesday we celebrated my birthday because I cant see him today so he just spoiled me. I mean he didn't buy me anything but I'm glad. He was just really sweet.
Today my mom gave me a living locket from origami Owl. Its  necklace with little charms. it's very sweet and pretty. And Anthony got me a video game I really wanted which he shouldn't have but it is nice being spoiled instead of the other way around which it always was. I like him:)
We are still just dating. I am fine with that I don't want to rush him until he is ready I enjoy what we do even though EVERYONE I know calls him my boyfriend and me his girlfriend and yet neither of us say anything when people say that. it's too confusing to explain. He is awesome and makes me feel like the most beautiful woman alive:)
Memorial weekend meaning a long weekend at work hopefully it goes by fast. This month certainly is!

Because life is short and you are hot

Things have been going great with Anthony:) We have been dating for a month now and we are not in a relationship yet oh though the way we act sometimes it feels like it haha. He doesn't want to rush but also because the last girl he was with he works with and they are close friends and she asked him specifically to not tell her about his dating life so he told me until he can take me to work and show me off he has no right to call me his girlfriend and when he asks me he wants to make it special:)
I've been on vacation since the 11 and it has been going wonderful. Spent the first couple days with one of my best friends then I spent the next few days with Anthony:) Now I am just having some down time which I miss and then its girls night Friday and back to see Anthony Sunday night for game of thrones night with his friends. He took me to Portsmouth NH Tuesday to walk around and then I met his mom and we went to Kittery for some shopping which I blew some money. Then we went to see Iron Man 3 in a HUGE Imax Theater in Mass. I didn't get home until midnight but it was a fantastic day:) He is a wonderful man and makes me incredibly happy:)

I bought a new wine that Barefoot just came out with where you are supposed to drink it on ice and it is really delicious. I've also seem  to have gone down a pant size. I had to get rid of my two favorite pair of Old Navy shorts that have not been worn enough because they got to big and now my pants are too big so I wash them so they fit better. I don't really know how it happened but it did.

My parents told me if I decide to do online schooling or stay in Maine to do my vet tech program they will pay my car payment! oh the money I will be able to save!! no loan payments and no car payment holy smokes. I am so lucky to have the support I do. Thank You Parentals:) Life is going pretty well for me. I hope things continue to look up! There is a school in Maine where I can get my degree and its accredited.